Eel Waiting in Noon Water

Pain Reliever
Internship
Spring Break
The greatest drug: BEER

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Pain Reliever
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My jaw is fucked up so bad. When I wake up in the morning I unhinge it just by yawning and there are incredibly loud clicks on both sides that make my eyes pop out of my head in shock because I forgot that they click. Then for the rest of the morning I go about my day drinking a bunch of water and eating cereal without a problem. Then in the middle of the afternoon, the jaw starts to have immense pain and I suck down 5 pills of pain reliever and then an hour later all is better again... this might be a problem later in life, but here's hoping I don't live that long to deal with it.

I would consider jaw surgery but that would mean having my jaw wired for god-knows how long. I don't mind having to eat only slurpees, the not being able to talk right is what gets me. I wouldn't smile for months nor talk because I would hate the teeth hinges. My aunt Marla had to have her jaw wired when she was a teenager. At one point she got so desperate for solid food that she blended a burger (with the works) and sipped it through a straw - total fear factor style.
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Internship
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The Man is convincing me to get an internship this summer in my major. I explained the numerous problems that would go along with a 7 week internship: apartment (pay the rent but I don't live in it), job (I may have to quit just to spend a couple of weeks being treated like shit for free), and living expenses wherever this internship may be. Also he told me at such a late date. I looked at a couple and when I get a little excited about it because it seems doable, the deadline turns out to be back in February. Crap! I would rather do an intership when I get my SCUBA certification then I could do some cool research underwater. I'm sure that the head researcher wouldn't want to do any of the diving and he woud say, "Ah hell, just send one of the interns." Thats my cue.

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Spring Break
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I am spending it at my mothers. *blubber*

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Oh, how I love the alcohol
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I like alcohol but I'm pretty sure that I'm going to have to stop drinking it for health reasons. I know I'm only 21 but I think that I have completed enough drinking in my day to last me for a while. Plus, the beer has so many calories. I have an alternative however. I haven't smoked pot since high school, I quit becuase the effect had changed and it was no longer relaxing, but I am considering getting back on the wagon. I just have to find a trustworthy dealer. Good news is that I already live in Humboldt County and am incredibly capable of finding great pot.

Of course, I would only engage in this illegal drug after work and school and when I'm ready to go to bed. This is just to make sure I don't do anything stupid, but I only care that it takes my mind off of how hard I worked to understand the krebs cycle, fungus life cycle, and how to calculate standard deviation from a study.

Plucking the Low-Hanging Apple

The shitty Work
5.99 movie

Work shouldn’t be this shitty.

I used to get along with the kids at this apartment complex but now they have all started a rogue alliance against me. I was going on my round and I was walking to my next “stop” and there was a group of 7 to 10 year-olds that were crowded together, and one of them in a high squeaky voice says, “Security Guard, people.” I was shocked. What the fuck are these tiny kids doing that they need to stop so that I don’t see them doing it? Plus, I really don’t give a shit if these kids smoke crack right on the sidewalk as long as my boss doesn’t find out that I saw them but didn’t stop them. Its not like I’m stopping future genius’s from curing diseases or our faulty economy that will soon end America, in 20 years. They are just going to end up dead or the fast food workers I am always courteous to so that they don’t spit, blow boogs, or drop dandruff into my food.

Some teenage boys watch me too much though. I walk past some of them and I might as well be in a petri dish for how much they scrutinize me. I really don’t know what is going on in their raging hormone minds but I would rather not know then find out and somehow make them stop. These 14-18 year old boys trying to be older than they are by smoking a pack a day and saying cuss words way to fucking often to seem off handed, are only ruining their futures by not trying to become better than they will be. I’m sure when they grow up they will be working in an outlet second-hand store, barely making rent and yet not having a problem with it, instead they could learn anything they wanted to and improve on it. However, these FUCKERS think that they are still cooler than I am!

Great movies and why they work

I am almost convinced to switch my favorite movie from Four Rooms to My Best Friend’s Wedding. Four Rooms (be referred to as FR) is so awesome that I laugh every time I see it, plus has four different directors who each as a different shitty situation for this bellhop played by Tim Roth. On the other hand, MBFW makes me feel warm inside and want to make more friends with people. Just a heads up on my social skills, I don’t really like people enough to make a long term commitment to being good friends with them. I get bored to easily with people’s personalities.

MBFW has a fantastic cast: Dermot McDillian. Wow, he is so freaking gorgeous I almost want to become his stalker. It also has a really good scene where Julia and Michael have a moment on a boat cruising through Chicago – it is romantic, funny, and above all an endearing and charming sequence of good lines that make you want to join in.

Plagarising blotto grotto doctor

I read this one blog that does an index at the beginning of every blog - this punk-ass bitch is going to copy him.

1. Lab Group and masturbation
2. Clayton's new cell
3. Bogus spring break

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Lab group Shit
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My lab instructor has taken a liking toward me so he cuts me slack on quizes to give me more points. I have to thank my lab partners for doing such the service. All of them, 'cept one, show up late for lab, never show up for lecture, and skip out on the fly thing. Because they do this, they make me look like super-duper-uber student. I look like I'm a total hard-working genius next to them. I don't think my lab teacher would notice me at all if I were in another lab group. My lab instructor informed me that I should do my own flies because they keep getting contaminated and to do the lab on my own. So I fucking started my own fruit fly culture... yargh! I hate this fuckers so much and now I have the duty to come in every day; this can be avoided actually to help me. Now that I don't have a fly-schedule to abide by I can skip a day and then just throw the flies out the next day and I won't have to feel guilty for not doing work.

I was hoping that my lab teacher wouldn't make me move to another group because I actually like my lab partners - I would hang out with them outside of class - but they are a bunch of slackers.

He may also think that I'm a badass student because I worked hard on the lab report that was due yesterday. The only reason I got it done before the rest of the lab class was because my group wanted to meet up last Saturday to go over everything - so I thought I would have shit the down. My lab group didn't show up, why didn't I guess that?

I kind of betrayed those bitches to because I saw the lab group who sits behind us, working on the lab report on the first floor of the library and I worked on it with them while talking shit about my lab group. I felt a little disghusting, but I don't blame myself for venting against them.

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Cody's new cell phone
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My dad just bought my brother a cell phone and he had to call me for the first time when I decided to skip class and sleep in. I will now punish him by giving him a specific ringtone that I think will disturb him - Barbie Girl. I'm also going to give my dad the Indiana Jones theme song because he looks like Indiana Jones. I can only get stupid electronic sounding ringtones though, which bites ass.

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SB the dead zone
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Spring Break is not going to be enjoyable for me because I'm not going anywhere. I'm not sure that I would like to go to Mexico or wherever the college students go to have the fattest orgy ever. I don't like diseases especially ones that infect my flower. That means that I will take a vacation to my mother's house and she can cook for me and clean up after me while I work on my lab notebook. I would hate to be alone at home with nothing to do... I should get a fucking hobby. But alas I still have to work and that is no picnic. It has gotten better because these problem tenants just got evicted and it makes life a little easier. I don't cry as much in the bathroom at work now.

Fronting the Cheese Man

Tomorrow I have to go to this study group with my lab partners in crime, no Biology and figure out what the hell the teacher wants from us in the lab report. I'm hoping they have something to bring to the table... but that hoping goes with a smirk. They think that I'm super-student with all the answers right on the quizes and always on top of things. I'm too freakin' busy to try to do my homework. I was going to work on it over the weekend but I need to get my shit together before tomorrow so that I will know a little of what we are supposed to do. I have more important matters at hand - like my boogers to be picked.

Yesterday, I got home around 6pm all grouchy as hell and put my key in the door, opened the door and tried to yank the key out of the lock. The lock has been acting up lately so I have to sit there for 10 minutes jiggling the key, willing the little bars inside to go into place so I can finally pass out in my lovely bed. Last night I was pissy and tired so I thought wtf, I'll just grab some pliers and twist the motherfucka out! Who the missed out on telling me that keys are really breakable. I thought keys were indestructable and in no way would they ever break, melt, sink, or die. I twisted it and the top broke off and the rest of the key is still inside of the lock. The landlord is notoriously not ever around - potsmoker, enough said. I tried calling him and leaving sweet messages but no answer. Plus I wanted to go to bed and fall into sweet sleep then worrying about some rapist coming in, stealing my laptop and my 7 month stint of being a born-again virgin and then leave without a phone number. So I passed out and woke up 12 hours later to head to school. My door is unlocked for now until I have time to hunt down my landlord and drag him to my apartment to change the lock (I am unauthorized to change it myself).

Theres also this possum that is hanging around my porch, incidentally I live on the second floor so I don't know how a blind fat-ass rat could/would climb up the stairs to my front door and snuggle up against it. At first I hated this thing - scaring the shit out of me at 1 am and making it so that I have to go around him to get inside my apartment. However, now I see the benefit of him keeping robbers, gangster hit-men, and former stalker boyfriends away from me residence. How does he keep these people away you ask? I don't think you understand the complexity of how ugly possums are. What god would create such an atrocious animal - maybe thats why they're blind so they can't tell they look so hideous. If they weren't blind, I'm sure we'd see a bunch of dead possums everywhere because they would have committed suicide as soon as they found out they were man-handled by satans asshole and spit back out.